And one morning, the magical word appeared on the digital screen: “Pregnant”. <3 <3 <3
Overwhelming happiness. Disbelief. Excitement. Relief. Disbelief again. LOVE.
The mixture of emotions I felt in that fleeting moment, staring at the pregnancy test. WE DID IT!
Tears running down my cheeks I stare at the test, laughing and crying, receiving toothpaste-flavoured kisses from my partner. Never did I expect to feel so loved and blessed, crying in the toilet wearing my PJs 🙂
So indeed, on a Friday morning, day 28/28 of my cycle, March 31st 2017, five months after we decided to ditch contraception and go for it, we finally saw that beautiful word appear.
I took a picture of the stick I’d just peed on (sorry!) just to be able to look at it during the day and try to understand it’s real. Of course I had to Google “Is false positive possible?” and I made another trip to Boots to pick up more tests, just in case!
I spent the day beaming (probably looking very silly). I’m a bit nervous about how the little beginning of a human is doing and if everything is ok, but I’m so happy! I thought my heart was going to burst seeing the dad-to-be so happy too. We are so excited!
The next morning I took another test and saw another positive result appear. 🙂
There had been signs of course, but having learned my lesson I didn’t want to get my hopes up (or his). I had had again spotting and some lower tummy cramps a week ago, and I had been extremely tired, falling asleep at 9pm. But the new symptom was swollen and tender breasts, which I never get, not even during PMS! And finally, of course, no period.
I have to admit it doesn’t feel very real yet. I feel perfectly normal (apart from the fatigue and big boobs). I still have one more pregnancy test (with a weeks indicator) just in case I need a reminder/affirmation one day. I will soon book my first doctor’s visit and we are also thinking to go for an early ultra sound scan to make sure everything looks alright and also just to see there is indeed someone there!
We are just a few weeks shy of Easter when we are meant to gather together with my partner’s family. We think this will be a nice opportunity to tell them. It will still be very early of course (only 6 weeks), but this way we can share our joy and also get the family support at this exciting time, even if – especially if – things don’t go well.
I booked flights to Finland to go visit my family in a month’s time, and hopefully that will be the chance to share the good news face to face and maybe even with a picture from the first scan!
Praying for a healthy pregnancy and child… maybe we’ll have a little Christmas miracle!
xoxoxo,
Sini