When I feel like I’m struggling (see my previous post), I try to focus on all things positive in my life, the best thing being, of course, my little girl Maia. I stopped writing the monthly baby updates when Maia turned one and was no longer a baby, but I really wanted to write one now even if just to humour myself! And maybe those of you who have read about Maia before she was even born!❤️
Maia is now 1-year and 9-months old. This year I’ve learned how different toddlers are from babies! 😄 And as much as I love babies, toddlers are amazing. They are also a lot of hard work with all the unfiltered and uncontrolled emotions butt the curiosity, the excitement, and of course the unconditional love for mummy well make up for the tantrums!❤️
I remember worrying about losing my close bond with Maia when I stopped breastfeeding a month after I returned to work (she was 14-months old) but thankfully that hasn’t happened. I admit that being away from her to work does still make her (and me!) a bit anxious and especially after holidays she was reacting to the separation but overall she has been a happy bunny. Actually, she only acts out when with me, not so much when I’m away (which obviously is a shame but who do I have to blame…). But I’ve learned that mummy may get the worst of a toddler, but she’ll also get the best of her.
I may not spend every minute of the day with Maia anymore, but I still know my girl. I feel like I know her even better now because, again no offence to babies, she’s a proper little character at this age! Her personality is coming out more and more as she learns to communicate and interact with us. Last year I thought she was a bit shy with new people because she had spent so much time with just me and yes I was beating myself up about it. But now I can see that she really is more of an observer in new situations and with new people and always takes her time rather than running straight in head first. Maia is very aware of her personal space (don’t just go over and pick her up please) and likewise respects others’. She has never taken a toy from another child nor acted aggressively (yet anyway) and she can’t understand why anyone would do that to her. Maia is quite a gentle little girl.
Our girl loves the outdoors and we take her out everyday even if just to the nearby park and playground. Our little “village” in central London has a cute square by the church just around the corner from our house, with a rose garden and a really nice playground. My husband, who does the morning shifts with Maia, has learned the hard way that the park only opens at 7.30am on the weekend! The swing used to be Maia’s firm favourite and she could keep on swinging for soooo looong but now it’s getting boring and Maia has started exploring the slides and roundabouts and climbing frames more. Now I miss the “swing times” a bit because it’s obviously much harder to keep her in one piece when she’s climbing and jumping off everything with no fear!! Bumps and bruises are pretty common but thankfully we haven’t had any serious incidents yet…
When Maia turned one and started walking we signed her up to Gymboree, which is an indoor soft play club. She has a “play and learn” class once a week and this is where I think she really developed her surprisingly good balance, running and climbing in the play gym. With her membership she can also use the soft play area any day during “open gym” (in between classes) which has been a rainy day saviour and also a chance to play with other kids. I do worry sometimes that she doesn’t have enough play mates outside her classes. Luckily our nanny has befriended another nanny who looks after twins of Maia’s age who live nearby.
Maia no longer goes to Monkey Music but she hoes to the library’s nursery rhyme sessions – she loves nursery rhymes and singing and has a cute baby version of her favourite “twinkle twinkle little star”. According to her nanny she likes the sessions the most when there aren’t so many kids and it’s a bit calmer. Maia has her own library card and they often bring home new books or toys (they have a toy library too).
This autumn we added an art class to her weekly schedule. It’s also at Gymboree, which is conveniently a walking distance from us. She attends with her nanny and they bring her art home and we have a “washing line” of her masterpieces in the playroom.
Maia loves many indoor activities too and has a surprisingly good concentration for activities such as drawing, painting and play dough (the last one being the latest addition to our “arts and crafts”-kit at home). Books and reading in general have been in favour since she was a baby but now she follows the story (a bit) more than just looks at pictures and turns pages. Flap books are the most fun and at the moment I read her a flap book about where the babies come from, although I don’t know if she understands any of it yet. She does look at my bump suspiciously and lifts my top to see where the baby is! I read to her both in Finnish and English. I have found it difficult to stick with Finnish with her since I don’t speak the language with anyone else in my daily life. Consequently she doesn’t say anything in Finnish yet, which I find quite discouraging. Next year when I’m on maternity leave I’m planning to take her to a Finnish play group at the church hoping that’ll help! (It’s quite far from us though so let’s see…)
Two months ago I was still writing a list of words in Maia’s active vocabulary but I’ve stopped now because we get new (English) words every day! She has started saying more than just nouns, for example “sorry” if she pushed past you or “stuck” if she can’t get a toy out of the box. Maia now says two-word sentences such as “sheep there” pointing at a picture book or “more please” when wanting more food/drink. It’s funny how that little word “please” changes the dynamic between us in a good way – more often than not she’s definitely bossing me around but at least she does it politely! We’ve also taught her to ask for help rather than just rage in frustration when she can’t do something and that has helped a bit!
We (and when I say “we” I mean myself, my husband and importantly, Maia’s nanny) have been teaching her counting, colours and shapes and she’s getting very good! She can count to ten although she often gets carried away and starts jumping ahead – number six is often skipped haha! I just bought her a few wooden puzzles because puzzles are something we haven’t really done with her… And I think it’ll be a nice indoor activity when the cold and rainy autumn days arrive.
I think activities are very important for Maia’s happiness and development but it’s also obvious that she doesn’t get as frustrated nor throws as may tantrums as she would if she’d get bored. So it’s a win-win for everyone! Toddler tantrums can be so trying on the parents! I try not to take them personally. It’s a natural way for Maia to let out steam because she doesn’t really have the means to express and deal with her emotions in other ways yet. I try to be calm and consistent with her and when I feel my own blood boiling I just sit down and wait it out – she usually comes to me soon enough and I ask her “can we be friends again?” and we hug and carry on with our day.
We try to encourage imaginary play and Maia has a little play kitchen with utensils and pretend food. She also has my old baby doll and a toy pram and it’s so heart warming to watch her take care of the baby. Makes me imagine what she’ll be like with her baby brother! Although most likely it’ll end up in tears of frustration when she’s not allowed to carry him around and feed him stuff! 😅
Maia’s routine has been the same since she dropped her morning snooze in the beginning of the summer. She wakes up sometime between 6am and 7am, has breakfast with daddy and usually watches Peppa Pig or plays with her toys (or draws). In the mornings she usually goes out with her nanny to activities or the park and comes back by 12.30pm for lunch. By 1.30pm she goes down for nap in her cot for about 2 hours. Maia has her tea around 5.30pm and I get home after 6pm for a short play before we start our bedtime routine of bath and bedtime story with milk. By 7pm she’s asleep.
It takes patience to live with a toddler who wants to be independent and do things herself, but I try to remind myself that it’s how she learns. Maia was so proud when she picked out her own clothes and (with a little help) got herself dressed! So I tried to ignore the fact that she was wearing a princess dress and a puffy gilet… I try to let her take the lead in whatever I’m trying to make her do, like brushing her teeth or tidying up toys. She clearly likes to be in control and constant battles would be exhausting. For example last night I let her sleep with her princess shoes on… What can I say – pick your battles!
Speaking of battles, a word on eating… So I can’t say I have a fussy eater because I have video evidence from Maia’s nanny that Maia indeed does eat everything, even the food she pretends to hate when I’m in charge on the weekends. I don’t know why she is difficult with me, although the nanny suggests it’s because I always give in and feed her whatever she will eat… (nah can’t be that!). Most of the time Maia eats well on her own but sometimes she’s just not bothered but doesn’t mind if you shove it in. She does love breakfast though! Clearly her mother’s daughter. ❤️ Except that porridge is her favourite while I prefer poached eggs on toast.
Overall I think she’s growing and developing beautifully (mummy is so proud!!). I don’t know what she is “supposed” to be doing at this age but to me she’s doing perfectly well. We are not rushing with potty training yet, although I have thought about it since she tells me “poo poo” and gives signs of becoming more aware of what’s going on. She is also sleeping so well in her cot that I’m not rushing to convert it into a toddler bed by taking the sides off. I’m planning on enjoying my last full nights of sleep before we welcome another baby to the family! Or more realistically, before the late pregnancy insomnia kicks in…
In the baby updates I used to write about Maia’s weight and size etc which I think are less interesting at this point but just for the record: She’s still little. My guess for weight is around 9kg and she wears 12-18M size with sleeves and legs rolled up a bit. Her first hard sole shoes of size 2.5 still fit and she wears nappies size 5 (we’ve just sized up). I used to worry about her small size (2nd centile in the growth chart) but not anymore since she’s doing so well. She’s also grown taller and doesn’t stand out as being the smallest, she’s just quite dainty. I was the same size myself and I grew up to an adult size! In any case, she eats well and is growing and I’m happy with that!
It’s been my biggest joy to watch her grow and explore the world! It will be very exciting to see how she reacts to a little brother. Any tips for how to prepare her?
xoxoxo,
Sini